Aciphex = Pronounced 'AssEffects'

Congratulations Oronym The Clown : A Burning, Bad Taste & Belching Solution Needs To Have The Sound "Ass" In It.

But not those of the people who developed it, own it, named it or market it.

Doctor Side Effects says watch for: "headache, diarrhea, nausea, vomiting, and abdominal pain, pain, sore throat, gas, infection, and constipation."

Brown nose much lately?

I'd feel like heaving it up after looking into that particular face.

Perhaps a change in liff-style is in order?

In every event, it's really a Brand name that struck me into laughter.

Ask, is this a mistake that went unvetted?

More likely, I feel, based on my previous experience, the name was birthed with the best of intentions, but as it was wrangled through sooo many documents, committees and meetings and casual conversations, e.g.:

Hey Douglas, how aggressive is your TV campaign to launch AssEffects?

Within a month AssEffects will be in the faces of millions of daytime viewers.

So, somewhere along the line, a random or cog of some sort heard it and knew it to be bogus.

Most just suppressed the knowledge out fear - the usual little ones.

But there were likely a few, one or two who had to suppress violent laughter and said the word at ever opportunity.

Making their working day just that much more bearable.

Or was it a daring jest by a covert corporate clown?

Dick Names Bad Breath Drug: AssEffects - To See If Anyone Notices?

Evil Clown

Nonce word: ?, never mind, you'll never hear it again.

- Litotes The Clown, Evil Clown Dictionary

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To Effectively Compete An Evil Clown Needs More Than Scary Face

There Are 3 Methods To Differentiate Yourself From Other Evil Or Scary Clowns

1.Cost leadership

Let's face it, magicians are great and kids clowns with clean records can almost be trusted, but do you have any what idea what they will charge for a party?

Just show up as someone's brother-in-law and hustle the bar until you are ready to preform.

2.Differentiation

What makes YOU stand out from other evil clowns?

OHhh, scary leer/face paint/baseball bat [sigh].

Try to spend more than five minutes thinking [Thinking] about it, the first five things you have thought up have been covered by evil clowns who have come before you, e.g.:

Off colored jokes
Filthy language
Offensive humor
Drunken behavior
Intimidation tactics

diu le lo moe if you expect more than a yawn for this shi

Think about your Unique Sales Proposition

3. Locus, Locus, Locus

Concentrate on one Tight Orifice – work it vigorously, meet the needs of your target better than the competition can even dream of doing to cultivate customer loyalty. Then dump them and move on.

Dreams Are The Disease

Evil Clown

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Ahhh To Wake, Perchance To Live . . .

The Return Of The Black Dog


How shall we be at last,

life without memory, future without past?

By small degrees, by small indiscretions, by small betrayals.

The agency ringing with myriad and subtle details.

And quivering with terrible stratagems pursue.

With embracing limbs of fleshy slumber ensue.

Limply lay we down to repose in the soporific place.

Our dreams to fall insensible and we deign to self efface.




Due to circumstances beyond our control Litotes The Clown is extemporaneously unavailable.
- Mng

Evil Clown

Emotion biased advertising has a powerful pull for women who don't want me to kill puppies.

- Litotes The Clown

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Insight Into The Mind Of An Evil Clown

Thoughts And Things From The Mind Of Ronald McDonald – Proudly 92% White Trash

Evil Evil Clown Drawing:
LOVE your work, work your LOVE
Medium: pilfered office suppliers on printer paper

Ronald McDonald's Blog
ronaldmcdonaldusa.blogspot.com

This is a must see sight for those who have any misgivings about:

Big "M" Supper Club
Der Schotte
Donken
Evil Clown
Golden Arches
Gronald's
Impastato's
Macca's
Maccen
MacDee
MacDoh
MacDohNo
Mackey-D's
Mackidånnkan
Mackies
Mækker'n
Mak Kee 麥記
Mäkk
Mäkkäri
Makku
Makudo
McChoke and Pukes
McDeath
McDee
McDee's
McDick's
McDo
McDonal
McDonald
McDonaldos
McDonas
McDoof
McD's
McEvilClown
McPuke
Mec
Mek
Meki
Mekkes
Mekki
Mickey-D's
Moulée de clown
Old Mak 老麥
Old Nick
Pat Panepinto Mart
Placcy-D's
Ronchin Ronnies
Rotten Ronnie Oddo's
Rotten Ronnie's
Rotten Ronnys
Rottin Ronnies


For another side of the greasepaint, see:

http://www.mcdonalds.com
http://www.ronald.com

Evil Clown

For the last eight years I have documented coercion, threats, intimidation and manipulation by McDonald's and Leo Burnett Advertising against me due directly to my work as Ronald McDonald.

- Joe Maggard, former Ronald actor, 2003


I feel badly about what I've done with young people. I was the happy face on something that was horrendous.

- Geoffrey Gulliano, former Ronald actor who later embraced vegetarianism

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