Look For A Clown Late Late At Night

Hi, I'm looking for a clown:

CRANK:

A person who espouses and supports illogical and poorly-reasoned causes and idiologies and who bothers other people with his nonesense.

Low purity methamphetamine.

I just checked the phone book.

There are about 23 Clowns in North America - according to a sloppy check of private phone numbers.

But there is only ONE (1): A. Clown

I wonder if he gets any calls late late at night.

I wonder why he didn't change his name.

Maybe, he already did.

There is ONE (1): E. Clown

It isn't me. I almost phoned, just to be sure.

I wonder if they are related.

Do they ever get each other's calls?

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“What is called for here is not genocide, the killing off of the population of incompetent cultures. But we do need to think realistically in terms of the phasing out of such people. To think otherwise is mere sentimentality. ”

- R. Lynn, 1972. Co-Editor, Mankind Quarterly as quoted in:

Herrnstein, R. & Murray, C. 1996. Bell Curve: Intelligence and Class Structure in American Life. Free Press Paperbacks Book.

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Evil Clown Resources & Co-Conspirators:

Evil Clowns' Lair

Evil Clown PentWhistle

Evil Clown Pills

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Think of this as an Evil Clown Exquisite Corpse

Exquisite Corpse – Excellent Cadavers - Cadavre Exquis

The exquisite corpse will drink the young wine - Le cadavre exquis boira le vin nouveau

Accidents of the Collective: An antique parlor game with contributions from each.

Poetic fragments smashed together to reveal the unconscious reality in the personality of the group - Ernst called "mental contagion."

In Litotes The Clown Experimental version, Litotes will glue together the thoughts and pictures of other bloggers into a new creation.

Litotes will limit the experiment by being Clowncentric. I conduct searches based on whim. I turf gos se image and yu bun duh or irrelevant words.

For each one that I share there are dozens of I turfed for the benefit of all human kind.

How will the words and pictures change each other? Will banal happy clown drawingss reveal a here-to-fore unknown hard edge or deep shadow?

Will pictures maniacal nightmare clowns be soften by the sentimental memories?

Could this be the first in a series?

Let’s explore:

Exquisite Evil Clown #001

The Words:

Clowning me from Decay On Net

Those who knows me knows that I like to joke around, crack stupid jokes etc etc. I just enjoy making people around laugh.

But perhaps I’ve overdone it. Someone told me to grow up today. It’s like a knife stabbing into your heart. Does joking means that someone is still immature and needs to grow up? Does it mean I have to be serious all the time and stop joking?

Perhaps I should stop. You keep joking until people think you haven’t grown up.
And to make things worst, when I say something serious, people still think I’m joking.

Perhaps I should cut the jokes. Stop being a clown myself.

The Picture:

Happy Birthday, Nick! From Ubermilf

It's Nick's birthday today! I hope he likes what I got him. He wanted a pie, so I'm sending a clown friend of mine to bring it to him in person.

He's a really good aim. He likes to give birthday spankings, too. Bend over, Nick! You're about to make a new friend!

Learn more about Exquisite Corpse

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Piracy is the sincerest form of flattery

- Litotes The Clown

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UPDATES:

2005-12-30

Litotes The Clown Thanks Ubermilf For Kindnesses Evil Clown Apologizes For Delayed Gratification

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Evil Clown Resources & Co-Conspirators:

Evil Clowns' Lair

Evil Clown PentWhistle

Evil Clown Pills

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Europe After Rain And The Unmaking Of France

Who's in charge here, clown?

I remember, as a child, watching somber documentaries of war. Black and white and later early color hashes - the blurring images of adult men and death machines.

Maps
Arrows
Bold Plans
Waves of fighters

And sometimes a miracle. I remember seeing a figure... was it Christ? The Holy Mother Mary? Whole and intact in the corner of a Shattered church on a broken street in a burned to the ground town.

Standing clean and untouched like a little miracle in the ashes.

A seemingly arbitrarily supernatural event next to the missing walls.

The Haunting poetic voice of Laurence Olivier.

Tonight Paris is depressed and Burning. A city engulfed in hate and pain.

And yet, here too, a sign for our times.



NB: Thanks to PentWhistle the Clown for the pic.

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Willard: Soldier, do you know who's in command here?
The Roach: Yeah.

- Apocalypse Now (1979)

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Resources and Co-Conspirators:

Evil Evil Clowns' Lair

PentWhistle the Clown

Pills the Clown

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Clown Face Smeared With Blood From Human Cannibalism

Evil Clown’s Naughty Halloween Costume Becomes Year Long Obsession

It's just another Day In The Life of Miss McDonald

When: November 5-25, 2005O
pening: Nov 5, Saturday, 7 pm
Where: Store For All Seasons, 605 Shaw Blvd., Mandaluyong City Metro Manila, Philippines

Come celebrate one whole year of Miss Mcdonald!

The Miss McDonald project began as a Halloween costume created on October 30, 2004. Pictures of Miss McDonald in various mundane situations were taken, with the idea of posting them in an online journal.

The very first post went up on November 6, 2004. Since then, the Miss McDonald LiveJournal has been visited thousands of times by people all over the world.

The exhibit will feature prints of the best of the year's online pictures, as well as outtakes and other never-seen-before photos. All prints are for sale.

Miss McDonald will be at the opening on November 5, Saturday, from 7-8 pm. Come by and celebrate with us!

See the Evil Clown Pictures here.

'nough said.

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Donnie: I made a new friend today.
Dr. Thurman: Real or imaginary?
Donnie: Imaginary.

- Donnie Darko (2001)

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Resources and Co-Conspirators:

Evil Evil Clowns' Lair

PentWhistle the Clown

Pills the Clown
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Harassed Sparky The Clown Loses His Sense Of Humor And Assaults Animal Rights Paparazzi

Fanatical Animal Rights Protester Gets A Shove And Hits Self In Face With Camera To Prove Something

“I feel that provoking a clown by invading his privacy, threatening his livelihood and annoying the young families who are his customers to violence in front of young impressionable children and then filing police complaints against him is what the animal rights movement is all about.”

Protesters were blocking the entrance to turn back crowds, bothering customers, handing out flyers, hanging banners and generally trying to get the public to leave or otherwise boycott the circus admitted they would be happy if the government unilaterally legislate change to outlawed the circus.

Protesters were disappointed that the workers who support their families through the circus didn’t join with their protest but instead occasionally glared at protesters or called them names.

A spokesperson for Manchester Animal Protection said: “The actions of circus staff are disgraceful.”

“We are disappointed that the clown who carried out this unprovoked, cowardly, savage beating has been let off with a caution.”

The paparazzi is said to be healing nicely from a small bruise.

The anti cruelty fanatics insisted the ‘unconscionable terror attack’ will not deter them from protesting.

“We will continue to protest against this and other animal circuses and hope that the Government quickly introduce legislation to end this animal cruelty.”

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It doesn't matter if you believe in Evil, because Evil doesn't care what morons thinks.

- Litotes The Clown

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Resources and Co-Conspirators:

Evil Evil Clowns' Lair

PentWhistle the Clown

Pills the Clown

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References:

Animal Protester Clown Incident Ends In Violence
Anti Cruelty Demonstration Ends In Clown Assault

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Corporate Clown Shares Free Letter Of Resignation

Being A Friend In Deed, I Helped A Friend In Need
Because He Asked A Favor, I Share The Fruits Of My Labor

I have worked in those places too.

A friend (and coworker) asked for a ‘burn all bridges’ resignation letter that would say ‘kiss my ass’ with bigger words.

I was happy to oblige. Since then it has been an inspiration to me in dark times and places. I often keep it nearby, ready to fill out at a moments notice.

It has often acted like psychic armor, reminding me of my basic freedom, dignity and wit when others have tried to deny them on all counts.

Please feel free to use it literally or psychically, in its entirety or as a sample resignation letter to better spur your imagination.

Sometimes the relief of leaving a bad job can amount to an ecstasy. It can also add years to a much better life.

Today’s Date

To whom it may concern:

Please be advised that [You Name Here] Litotes regretfully submits his resignation effective immediately.

Regrettable, because, in the course of our lives we sometimes come across a place of work were we are welcomed and received, have the opportunity to grow and stretch and reach for our full potential.

The kind of place where you look forward to coming to work in the morning, where the faces in the office are more than just strangers or co-workers and you can feel pride in the contribution you make to the organization and the vital part you play on the team and in it’s success; where you are more than just a number.

Regrettable, because, this is not that kind of place and I should have realized it much sooner.

This is the kind of place where tyranny, sloth, avarice and the darker forces of the neo-corporatists' dire vision of a future in which there is no room for humanity, not only find a home but thrive in an atmosphere of degradation, fear and loathing.

This kind of jack-booted fen-heeled moralism is an embarrassment to good fascists everywhere and untenable to any freedom loving, democratic oriented person with a shred of common decency, sympathy or understanding.

Working here is the moral equivalent of working for unreliable pederasts pushing crack to preschoolers, only with fewer benefits, lower pay, less job satisfaction, longer hours, poorer working conditions and you.

My heart goes out to those few good souls, left here, chained by circumstance, to the rails of unremitting toil like galley slaves. Rest assured that I will work tirelessly for their escape, freedom and salvation.

I must, in the end, win over the forces of decay and entropy which you represent. The general level of incompetence and the appalling lack of organization, direction and leadership is only equaled in depth and degree by the level at which you are constantly and scornfully ridiculed.

Rest assured that I will make it my mission to expose this snake pit of pomposity and perversity and that yours will be the first back against the wall when the revolution comes.

Like incestuous shadows and their hideous off-spring the obscenities which you represent and perpetrate need only the full light of day to dispel them.

Yours in unremitting antagonism,

[Your Name Here]

Pax et Libertas

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When cryptography is outlawed, bayl bh3gyn~~if jv^yy IunirF ce@vin%7pl.

- Litotes the Clown

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Resources and Co-Conspirators:

Evil Evil Clowns' Lair

PentWhistle the Clown

Pills the Clown

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Lo Those Many Moons Ago, When The First Evil Clown Appeared

Evil Clown Friend Confesses: We Were Both On Our Way To Becoming Chemically Unfit To Operate Machinery Of Any Kind

I have been prowling but have found little of note this halloween. Hopefully reports will continue to filter in from the front.

One bright spot has been cavenoid.

Besides being interested in shark hunts and exorcisms he has an Evil Clown aquaintance elegantly blogged at Entropical Paradise (Short Attention-Span Theater):

The other day I got a phone call from my friend in New York. He asked if I could guess what his Halloween costume was going to be. I tried to come up with something clever and timely, "A Federal Indictment?" Nope. "What do I do every year?"

Then I remembered: Evil Clown. You have to love a guy who knows a classic and sticks with it. He's now in his second decade of the Evil Clown bit - and this year was really special. Big tie, big shoes, funny hat, and white contact lenses to make the whole thing - well - evil.

Give me more Masquerade...

N.B.: The featured picture and blog are unrelated, but I wish they were. The Drunk Clown picture has been linked from Bottom of the Bottle.

BotB is 'a heavy alternative Rock night. It is run and promoted by Dj Trev.'

Anarchy In The U.K. babe!

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Brontophobia: Fear of books written by the Bronte sisters.

- Litotes The Clown

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Resourses and Co-Conspirators:

Evil Evil Clowns' Lair

PentWhistle the Clown

Pills the Clown

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Evil Clown Uses Humor As Self Defense

Preteen Cutup Easily Takes Control Of Classroom

Dear Litotes:

I have a Clowning questions:

As a teacher I love kids, but there is one little ‘class clown’ that I want to beat the snot out of. He works like a devil on overtime to make everyone laugh. I want to ring this imp’s neck. Why is he making my life miserable?

Signed
Tots Teacher

Dear Tots Teacher:

Shut your pie hole and quit whining. If ‘kids’ can control how you feel and what you do, you are more immature than they are.

It is easy to label such children as troublemakers, inadequate personalities, socially impaired or in some way just plain wrong.

What nonsense! Being intelligent, bored and having a working bullshit meter does not make them the problem – it makes you the problem.

At the other end of the scale, they may indeed be suffering from an inferiority complex, self doubt or some other form of pain. And that pain is not always so abstract.

Having the fen kicked out of you everyday in front the girls locker room or being unrepentantly bullied by your so called ‘peers’ has led to some great comic careers (e.g.: Jonathan Winters, Joan Rivers, Eddy Murphy and Chris Rock), but it’s no fusking fun.

Humor is not just a defense against pain – it is an offence against pain.

The point of humor is not necessarily to get every Cro-Magnon deficient in your school to like you.

Bullies are afraid of looking stupid in front of others. It is very effective way to make them respect, if not fear, the clown’s facility with witty ridicule and repartee.

But back to you.

My bet is that you are single and have low self esteem. Which is a shame because you have ‘so much love to give’. Translation: you are an emotional black hole and enjoy complaining about being treated like a doormat.

As a plaything to the whims of others I bet you are drowning in debt.

You got into teaching for the same misguided emotional feelings: You feel that you had an awful childhood and that you are a worthless human being.

Maybe you should ask yourself:

Have you ever made a student repeat a year so you could flirt with their parent?

Do you wake up mornings wishing you would never have to wake up again?

Do you pray to God that you would die or get so sick you could spend a long time in the hospital and not have to do anything, at all, ever again?

As for the clown, does he make you uncomfortable because he’s telling the truth? Are you a mediocre teacher? Are you overweight? Is school actually a black hole heck of a lot of fun?

The Clown you want to throttle is looking back at you from the mirror.

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Laugh, clown, laugh, even though your heart is breaking.
- Simon, aka Flok, 1928. Laugh, Clown, Laugh.

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Resources and Co-Conspirators:

Evil Evil Clowns' Lair

PentWhistle the Clown

Pills the Clown

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