'America' Is America's Porn Name

Readily will I display the intestinal fortitude required to fight on to the objective and complete the mission, though I be the lone survivor... Do you mind if I keep my socks on?

I can now more effectively segment my life.

Thanks to the drugs and the army training.

For instance: on my facebook profile I neglect to post about the drug deal/hockey game/you owe me sex fall-out/screaming match; and in my journal I take it for granted that I am beyond hating hockey – I just don't care – our out-of-town/foreign mercenaries bought and paid for by billionaires are better than your commercialized athlete-of-fortune hired by billionaires. I mean, fcuk, I can't even give a shit.

What I am basically talking about is compartmentalization – without the psychosis.

Being able to accept (laugh) at the contradictions without identifying with any of them or losing yourself (or myself) in one or another or interstitial zones of between.

It's not that I ever believed in a Platonic ideal – it's that I thought I was a Platonic ideal.

That or the poor shit-heel chained in the cave or the monkey of it's own shadow.

So now everywhere I lie and I speak the truth.

Only the wise-asses know the tell of it.

I can sit on a stack of Bibles and cut off your legs just below the knee with a cunning phrase, or I can disembowel my own truth with a few choice words.

Today it was 21/69 and girl-woman at the register was wearing an armless winter coat (in this heat).

Her only fat was mammary perking her nipples and trying to create dimples on her bum. Poor objectified thing.

How I would like to help her cock the leakage in her segmentation.

It's good to be whole.

Evil Clown

Jesus was my bastard son: back when we worshipped the sun.

- Litotes The Clown

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The Smell Of An Evil Clown; Fear And Loafers

Are you easily embarrassed? Do you you fear the attention of an audience? Do people laugh with you; or at you?

Have you noticed that if an evil clown senses your fear they will glom onto you and rope you into their act in front of God and everyone?

So you pretend not to be afraid, you try not to let them smell your fear, or worse, you act like you hate clowns intensely.

Now that may put off an amateur, someone who simply slips on a nose to pull a one-off office prank.

But to a real clown you have just marked yourself out as a challenge, and the best kind of mark:

• They can smell your fear.
• Even if you win you lose.

You're going to get some uncomfortable attention. You don't like attention do you?

You really won't like the kind of attention you are about to get.

And the clown, the clown wants attention, all kinds of attention, just look at the way their dressed. Look at how they act. Why would anyone want, or need, that kind of attention?

Any half-bred clown is going to make you look like spunk smeared on an underwear ad in front of the everyone no matter what you do.

They've either thought it through before hand, gone over it, or been through it many times already.

They know all the moves you could make and they've got an arsenal of counter moves fully primed.

They know the angles. They see you coming. They've trained like commandos.

Maybe they'll let you take the first shot. Perchance they'll just jump on you at the first sign of resistance, hesitation or fear.

But pros usually work over amateurs with a handicap to keep things interesting.

Who's in control here? Some clowns love power. But is it more powerful to pretend to give power away?

Even if it blows up in their face and they look like a fool in the end, guess what? They win, they are a fool, they got attention. And you, you look like a mean sob without a sense of humor and you just got a lot of attention you didn't want.

- - - - -

What makes it so dammed funny?

According to James Beattie (1776):

Laughter arises from the view of two or more inconsistent, unsuitable, or incongruous parts or circumstances, considered as united in complex object or assemblage, or as acquiring a sort of mutual relation from the peculiar manner in which the mind takes notice of them.

E.g.:

Season's Greetings:

I wanted to send your family a Christmas Card of a monkey making love to a shaved beaver, but I have to have it copyrighted first. So, instead (now that the photo shoot is over), I am sending you a real monkey, a beaver, half a bottle of Viagra and 6 tabs of ecstasy.

Merry XXX-Mas,

Litotes The Clown

An evil clown is as empty and as full as a bible full of blank pages.

• Evil Clown

Evil Clown drawing:
Evil clown smells your fear and likes to point you out for special attention.

Ink on paper.

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Jesus Loves PornStars

Evil Evil Clown expostulates on the need to comfort the salacious


Between two thematically slutty devices: Zechariah’s announcement of John’s Vocation and the Litotes The Clown contemplation of the nature of sexuality and porn, creates a juxtaposition of rough cut scenes propelling an erroneously erotic digital framing of vivid sin that plays with itself in an ongoing, and often astonishing, intercourse between dialectic bodies of Passion, Knowledge and Chance.

Herein, then, are the broad thrusts and impelling upstrokes of compelling intensity that so enrapture an unanimously anonymous audience.

Let me explain:

I perform at a great many porn shows and sex conventions, I have a lot of free time while not on stage. You get friendly with people and start making friends. Also, as a way to kill time I started to Minister to the 'Talent' and Booth Bunnies of the porn industry. My plan was to reach out and to touch pornstars in a deep and personal way.

We often discuss hair and makeup, exchange t-shirts with slogans or just hang out in our thongs being friends.

In between fellatio and circumcision jokes I like to wedge in a little knowledge about the path to salvation for [God’s] people through the acceptance and forgiveness of their sins” (Luke Ford 1:77)

As Zechariah puts it, a clown's mission is to “get [in] before the Lord, break the ground and to pave his way, to give knowledge, of salvation, to his people, by the forgiveness of their sins” (Luke Ford 1:76b-77)

You may ask yourself: Does Jesus really love porn stars? Absolutely! All the time! Now that may go against what you thought about Jesus - but it's really true.

You see Jesus really loves pornstars as much as he loves pastors, soccer moms, alter-boys, liars, thieves, and politicians.

In his eyes, we are all the same. He can barely tell us apart without our tramp stamps. We're all just people in need of a big Savior who can come into our world and fill up our lives.

The Bible says that we are all screwed up. Whether you're having sex with multiple partners at scale for a limited liability Internet start-up, working at Starbucks, or running a church; we are all sinners.

And despite this fact, Jesus really, really loves us. He is not angry with us. He is not too busy for us. He isn't waiting for us to get our crap together and get off of Ecstasy and Viagra. He just says come. Come now. Check out what I have for you. It is greater then you can bare, it's bigger than you could ever imagine.

Lately I have been experimenting with giving away an expurgated New Testament Bibles inscribed with 'Jesus Digs Pornstars' in glitter on the cover as free gift for a a donation.

As you might have guessed, it has been harder then expected and deeply satisfying. But that won't stop my outreach.

At least the tshirts are doing really, really well.

Also: To read erotic God Loves Pornstar stories go here: http://xxxchurch.com/blog_home.php?b=confessions

Photo Credit:
robotgoboom
http://www.flickr.com/photos/dammit/
Adultcon 2007
Los Angeles Convention Center
September 22 2007
http://www.flickr.com/photo_zoom.gne?id=1427907546&size=m&context=set-72157602122231308#cc_license


Sex: It's ALL fun and games until someone loses and eye. - Litotes The Clown

Evil Clown

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