'America' Is America's Porn Name

Readily will I display the intestinal fortitude required to fight on to the objective and complete the mission, though I be the lone survivor... Do you mind if I keep my socks on?

I can now more effectively segment my life.

Thanks to the drugs and the army training.

For instance: on my facebook profile I neglect to post about the drug deal/hockey game/you owe me sex fall-out/screaming match; and in my journal I take it for granted that I am beyond hating hockey – I just don't care – our out-of-town/foreign mercenaries bought and paid for by billionaires are better than your commercialized athlete-of-fortune hired by billionaires. I mean, fcuk, I can't even give a shit.

What I am basically talking about is compartmentalization – without the psychosis.

Being able to accept (laugh) at the contradictions without identifying with any of them or losing yourself (or myself) in one or another or interstitial zones of between.

It's not that I ever believed in a Platonic ideal – it's that I thought I was a Platonic ideal.

That or the poor shit-heel chained in the cave or the monkey of it's own shadow.

So now everywhere I lie and I speak the truth.

Only the wise-asses know the tell of it.

I can sit on a stack of Bibles and cut off your legs just below the knee with a cunning phrase, or I can disembowel my own truth with a few choice words.

Today it was 21/69 and girl-woman at the register was wearing an armless winter coat (in this heat).

Her only fat was mammary perking her nipples and trying to create dimples on her bum. Poor objectified thing.

How I would like to help her cock the leakage in her segmentation.

It's good to be whole.

Evil Clown

Jesus was my bastard son: back when we worshipped the sun.

- Litotes The Clown

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Evil Clown Passes Camel Through Eye Of Needle To Piss Off Poor

"The eye of a needle" is part of a phrase attributed to Jesus by the synoptic gospels...

...I tell you the truth, it is hard for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven. Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God. [Matthew 19:24]

The parallel versions appear in Matthew 19:23-24, Mark 10:24-25 and Luke 18:24-25.

A rich frat boy asked Jesus what he should do in order to inherit eternal life. Jesus, known as a witty guy, replied that he should keep the commandments (Moses, remember him?), sell his possessions (no really) and give all his money to the poor (no, really). And then, once having given up shallow materiality should follow Jesus in poverty (no, really).

The Phat Boy asked if there was, like, any loop holes or donations or some such thing.

Jesus then turned to his impoverished disciples and made he famous remarks.

The Rich Kid was unwilling to do this, he and rich people have been filling up hell ever since.

But there is now good news for the super filthy rich.

1. Camels have become surprising cheap in recent years, not that expensive at all really.

Camel Classified Ads: http://www.camelphotos.com/cgi-bin/ads.cgi


2. New Food Processor technology combines pump and grinding operations. With highly calibrated angled cutters combined with rending, tearing and grabbing action and supplimental feeds to additional cutters and tubes to assist in solids reduction. This terrifying machine does more than just grind stuff up, it can pump it out under pressure in course, medium or particle size stuff under high pressure.

http://news.thomasnet.com/fullstory/483595

3. A Rich Australian Evil Clown has finally passed an entire camel through the eye of a standard needle under high pressure.

4. For a reasonable fee this service will soon be available to other rich bastards.




Meek Might Inherit Earth After The High And Mighty Leave

Evil Clown

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Jesus Loves PornStars

Evil Evil Clown expostulates on the need to comfort the salacious


Between two thematically slutty devices: Zechariah’s announcement of John’s Vocation and the Litotes The Clown contemplation of the nature of sexuality and porn, creates a juxtaposition of rough cut scenes propelling an erroneously erotic digital framing of vivid sin that plays with itself in an ongoing, and often astonishing, intercourse between dialectic bodies of Passion, Knowledge and Chance.

Herein, then, are the broad thrusts and impelling upstrokes of compelling intensity that so enrapture an unanimously anonymous audience.

Let me explain:

I perform at a great many porn shows and sex conventions, I have a lot of free time while not on stage. You get friendly with people and start making friends. Also, as a way to kill time I started to Minister to the 'Talent' and Booth Bunnies of the porn industry. My plan was to reach out and to touch pornstars in a deep and personal way.

We often discuss hair and makeup, exchange t-shirts with slogans or just hang out in our thongs being friends.

In between fellatio and circumcision jokes I like to wedge in a little knowledge about the path to salvation for [God’s] people through the acceptance and forgiveness of their sins” (Luke Ford 1:77)

As Zechariah puts it, a clown's mission is to “get [in] before the Lord, break the ground and to pave his way, to give knowledge, of salvation, to his people, by the forgiveness of their sins” (Luke Ford 1:76b-77)

You may ask yourself: Does Jesus really love porn stars? Absolutely! All the time! Now that may go against what you thought about Jesus - but it's really true.

You see Jesus really loves pornstars as much as he loves pastors, soccer moms, alter-boys, liars, thieves, and politicians.

In his eyes, we are all the same. He can barely tell us apart without our tramp stamps. We're all just people in need of a big Savior who can come into our world and fill up our lives.

The Bible says that we are all screwed up. Whether you're having sex with multiple partners at scale for a limited liability Internet start-up, working at Starbucks, or running a church; we are all sinners.

And despite this fact, Jesus really, really loves us. He is not angry with us. He is not too busy for us. He isn't waiting for us to get our crap together and get off of Ecstasy and Viagra. He just says come. Come now. Check out what I have for you. It is greater then you can bare, it's bigger than you could ever imagine.

Lately I have been experimenting with giving away an expurgated New Testament Bibles inscribed with 'Jesus Digs Pornstars' in glitter on the cover as free gift for a a donation.

As you might have guessed, it has been harder then expected and deeply satisfying. But that won't stop my outreach.

At least the tshirts are doing really, really well.

Also: To read erotic God Loves Pornstar stories go here: http://xxxchurch.com/blog_home.php?b=confessions

Photo Credit:
robotgoboom
http://www.flickr.com/photos/dammit/
Adultcon 2007
Los Angeles Convention Center
September 22 2007
http://www.flickr.com/photo_zoom.gne?id=1427907546&size=m&context=set-72157602122231308#cc_license


Sex: It's ALL fun and games until someone loses and eye. - Litotes The Clown

Evil Clown

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