Sunday, October 29, 2006

Evil Clown Stupidity Redefines 'Smart'

List Other Important Skills And Attributes That Bear Upon Your Application:

* Self-Conscious
* Cathartic
* Brooding
* Ironic
* Melancholy

Evil Clown Reasons For Being:

41. Normlisphobia

42. Belief that Stephen King's “It” TV miniseries adaptation had stupid ending

43. Smells like children

44. Fear and Loathing

45. Hiding out from brutal realities

46. Get in the game, create brutal realities

47. Close your eyes and try to imagine Saturday night if the Nazis had won the war, now open your eyes

48. You don't know what it is, but it's there, like a splinter in your mind, driving you mad

49. I didn't change, everything else did

50. Inevitable next step of Intelligent Design

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I come not to bury Caesar, but to dig him up.
- Litotes The Clown

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Quelques Raisons D'etre Un Clown Mauvais

Or Some Reasons To Be An Evil Clown:

31. Path of least resistance

32. Recurring 12 men in tiny car fantasy

33. Saruman convinced that the Halfing weed is bad

34. Morally ambiguous novel endings finally got to me

35. Resistant to treatment

36. Done lying for a living

37. Hypocrisy finally lost sacrilicious taste

38. Clowns in front office imposed dress code

39. Different is bad 'Duff'erent is good - can't get enough of that wonderful Duff

40. Feet not only Big Thing I got

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I leak out of definitions.
- Litotes The Clown

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Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Today's Reasons To Be An Evil Clown

Poster tribute: They Give Their Lives. Are You Doing Your Shopping?

Reasons To Be An Evil Clown:
21. If you can't join them, beat them

22. If you're wrong about being wrong. then you're right, ergo, two wrongs make a right

23. Attention Deficit Sandwich

24. Superpower - easily humiliate bullies with ridicule

25. My God funnier than your god

26. I cry you laugh = I laugh you cry

27. You wouldn't believe the write-offs

28. Priority seating for the elderly, disabled, pregnant women and 6'4" men in grease paint with knives

29. Delusions of goodness on the inside

30. Don't remember Alamo



Sometimes, I Pray For God To Take Me.
- Litotes The Clown

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Tuesday, October 17, 2006

More Reasons To Be An Evil Clown

Evil Evil Clown, scribble on paper, Taste The Difference

Reasons To Be An Evil Clown:

11. What gets measured gets done

12. Self help books depress me

13. After all I'm only one person

14. I asked myself what Jesus would do

15. Secure the crime scene, interview the neighbours... I'm goin'a miss my show

16. It all comes out in the wash

17. ISO 9000 turned out to be just a big phucking waste of time

18. Everybody hurts, sometimes

19. See yourself as a winner

20. Wash hands before and after? Stupid rules!

  • Art of the Evil Clown

  • Science always beats considerations of good and evil.

    - Litotes The Clown

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    Monday, October 16, 2006

    Reasons To Be An Evil Clown

    Subtle The Evil Clown Shares Insights, Ink and more on paper

    Reasons To Be An Evil Clown:

    1. 'Badittude' phucks up chances of promotion in fast food 'industry'

    2. Can't sing, act or dance

    3. Career Aptitude Placement Systems test never lies

    4. Ignorance is own reward

    5. Was never going to return that movie anyway

    6. Believe that the hypocrisyy of Christmas must be kept alive all year long

    7. Waitering really slow right now

    8. Bitterness over revelation that I am the problem

    9. Contempt and mockery of faux airport security measures

    10. Tender Hobo sex


  • Evil Clown

  • In this context, Officer, what does funny like a clown mean?
    Litotes The Clown

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    Monday, October 09, 2006

    Evil Clown Finds Solace In Your Abandoned Mixed Tapes

    The emotional and physical shakes are always a bit disorienting

    I am taking things day by day and doing my best to enjoy the good life that I have.

    It's still a struggle.

    My medication only serves to dull my pain and my mind and world away for a brief timeless time, what is mind without pain in lotus land?

    I am a bit haunted these days too, with vivid dreams, uncontorted balloons, and unpainted faces. That's a small but bitter pill for me, but hardly the galling scald that it once was.

    My time will yet come.

    My clowning is going horribly and it is a source of much anxiety. But I keep plugging away.

    I had a job interview on Thurs that went very well, I wore my new red shoes with the green laces. They seemed to think my shaking hands were part of the act.

    Anyway, now is the time to concentrate on numbers and signs, the voodoo of economics, the magic of business, and the science of keeping them guessing. And they say religion takes faith.

    I have been keeping myself busy as part of my road to wellness. I have been watching movies again and again and again and reading scifi backwards.

    But my big kick right now is bootleg audio tapes from second hand stores, thrift shops and garage sales.

    I particularly like mixed tapes that were obviously made for friends in highschool and contain personal references in the liner notes and funny A / B side names like 'Through The Wide Elysium' and 'Burned Away By Fire' personalized cover art is also a big plus.

    It seems that I have replaced my neurotic acquisition of figurines and mood-boxes with obsessively searching for pirated mixed tape music.

    I was very happy when I found Tom Waits 'the piano has been drinking' and a whole slew of 80s music that is impossible to find. It IS a tragedy that this sort of piracy didn't kill the music industry as predicted.

    My collection is rapidly growing.

    I miss you and I'm glad that you are doing ok. I hope stuff works out with the least amount of fuss.

    Best Wishes,

    Litotes The Clown

    Sometimes, I wonder, is my Dog superstitious?

    ---

    If hyperbole were all I needed in this world, I would have been set a long time ago.

  • Clonw

  • Photo Donation:

    Evil Clown Interview Suit, Self Portrait, They Can't Hurt Me Any More, I Hope...

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    Tuesday, October 03, 2006

    Evil Clown In Santa's Hat

    Business Meeting Drawing (taking notes is a useless waste of time when they say one thing but ph1uck the customer), Ink On Paper

    Accurately identifying and sizing your market is one of the most difficult exercises that an evil clown will undertake.

    Factors to fake include your socio-economic condition, your sector growth, your market penetration, volume/size/length/thickness, your assets and price.

    Markets should always be defined using both "top-heavy amplitude" and "bottoms-up realism."

    Don't overstate the size of your market even if you have special cream or perform in the dark.

    Always have an Exit Strategy


    Plan and memorize a couple of credible exit alternatives with supporting evidence:

    • scan the neighbourhood
    • review blueprints or building plans
    • note if fire exits are alarmed
    • test the response time of the morality squad
    • take special note of windows
    • do not underestimate the distance to the ground


    I'm all about empathy and baseball bats
    - Litotes The Clown

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    Debilitating Reason Pervades Evil Clown Nature

    Evil Clown Energy Does Not Align

    Evil Clown Drawing: Clown In Cog Neat Oh, mixed media on paper

    Is every clown is part of the same Infinite Self?

    If so, then as such, every clown must have hidden strengths.

    But having strengths makes one feel secure. The secure don't perform.

    Hence clowns are insecure and not part, but apart, of the infinite.

    For them can there be no atonement?

    As finite; clowns are scarce.

    Sacred clown energy does not align, but disrupts. An insecure and debilitating reason pervades their nature. Our laughter is the resulting Turbulence of this Intersection.

    Some posit that archetypes sit in a close human aspect. That explains one way we may see it.

    But what of Them? What of the other? What of us? How can we apprehend what we do not identify with?

    Yet Here they are; amoung us if not us.

    --

    Problems cannot be solved by the clowns who created them, only exploited for money and sex.
    - Litotes The Clown

    Evil Clown Gallery Coming Soon.

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