Litotes The Clown Challenges You To Know Your Inmate, Unnatural Talents

Why Not Pimp Your Own Freakish Impulses?

This In Issue

Do you posses what's required for your functioning existence? Why not pimp your own freakish impulses? Why not let them mislead you down the merry path?

I bet there are secret things you can do soooo well, others would be astonished to see pictures of them on the Internet. Think about it.

Could those shadowy abilities you try to repress be the dark angel of temptation trying to seduce you onto a road much less travelled?

Start with your weakness! All too of ten clowns focus on their good points.

No one ever gets anywhere by being:

• a team player who wants responsibility
• can work well independently
  
• has attention to detail
• the ability to work well under pressure
• having excellent communication skills (both orally and written)
• proficient with computers
• the mad desire to answer to three bosses

The papers are filled with those crappy jobs all the time. That junk will get you burned out faster than junk.

Have the courage to bridge the gap and do what you truly can't resist.

Here are a few classics to get you started:

1 Lust
2 Gluttony
3 Greed/Avarice
4 Sloth (not the mammal)
5 Wrath
6 Envy
7 Pride

Could you use some or ALL of these weakness everyday? Especially at work? If not, why not? You are missing out on the true path to excess.

Cultivate fate, conquer tears and take the plunge.

Evil Clown

This isn't just another disco drug deal gone bad, is it?
- Litotes The Clown

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Private Thoughts Of An Evil Evil Clown At Work

Litotes the Clown Journal Entry 2005-01-05

This morning Vile the Live Evil Clown (names are changed to protect the innocent / dead / consumed), in the freak show I call my life, mentioned ‘Dark Matter’ (see below) casually, was it a slip? He didn’t seem to realize that he said it. It was hard to tell. I didn’t want to look too closely or seem to look like I was looking too closely.

A little later Vile said ‘Cthulhu works through compression.’ Another slip? Or is he trying to judge my reaction? Ascertain my loyalties?

I kept my face blandly neutral and pretended I hadn’t heard. He watched me closely as he continued to talk about bandwidth, multimedia, etc. His attention was like a palpable radar. A physical force. Pinging me through the suddenly thick atmosphere.

In a war between vicious factions, it is sometimes best to seem to be too stupid to know what’s going on, to be ‘asleep’. To be a Clown. Sometimes the disguise is too perfect and while pretending to slumber – I sleep.

What happens to the Clown who can no longer tell where or when the dream begins?

I don’t know which side he is on, I must remain guarded and neutral. In a way it doesn’t matter – that he is in the game anyway is bad enough.

I hate this.

I must find a way; through the fog.

It’s like wonder being violated by a sense of fear and evil. Fear is by far the oldest and strongest of our emotions. Some believe that our biggest fear is of the unknown.

They are mistaken.

Our biggest fear is unutterable, even to ourselves. It is inevitably bound up with fascination and wonder. It is, in part, a machine in which collective insanity incinerates itself as a protective instinct.

It is a spectral tragedy spilling out of the mouth of madness. It is not the unknown – it is the unknowable.

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Dark Matter

Material that is believed to make up (along with dark energy) more than 90% of the mass of the universe but is not readily visible because it neither emits nor reflects electromagnetic radiation, such as light or radio signals. Its existence would explain gravitational anomalies seen in the motion and distribution of galaxies. Dark matter can be detected only indirectly, e.g., through the bending of light rays from distant stars by its gravity.

Cthulhu

'In His House at R'lyeh Dead Cthulhu waits dreaming, yet He shall rise and His kingdom shall cover the Earth.'

Cuthulhu is the chief deity of a secret cult (www.cultofcthulhu.net). The cult often masquerades itself as a hoax, a joke or fictitious religion. Though its seemingly harmless horror mythos of books, games and other culture products it seduces, corrupts and recruits new members.

Or put another way… A hoax that is presented as a hoax, that presents itself as a hoax, is no longer a hoax, but while an actual hoax is not presented as a hoax, neither is a work of fiction presented as a hoax -- but in the latter case this precondition for the hoax prevents it from functioning as a hoax. But then the "care & verisimilitude of an actual hoax" may create the suspicion in the reader that the tale is a fictionalized version of real events, and in effect an inverse hoax presenting reality as fiction rather than the other way around.

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It would be as useless to perceive how things "actually look" as it would be to watch the random dots on untuned television screens.

- M. Minsky, 1988. The Society of Mind. Simon & Schuster.

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Evil Clowns are No Accidnets

How did we get here? Some propose evolution, creationism, intelligent design and aliens. Evil Evil Clowns have their own ideas:

Evilution (n):

A general name for the history of the steps by which Evil has acquired the morphological, social, and metaphysical characters which distinguish it; a gradual unfolding of successive phases of growth or development.

That theory of generation which supposes the germ to pre["e]xist in the parent, and its parts to be developed, but not actually formed, by the procreative act; Evil doesn’t love you, but it will fuck with you.

That series of changes under natural law which involves continuous progress from the homogeneous to the heterogeneous in structure, from the single and simple to the diverse and manifold in quality or function, i.e.: from good to Evil; a process of development in which Evil becomes more and more complex by the differentiation of its parts, a continuous and progressive change according to certain laws and by means of resident forces; a process in which something passes by degrees to a more advanced or mature stage; [syn: development]; The sequence of events involved in the evolutionary development of Evil.

Having or exhibiting qualities tending to greater and greater injury and mischief; having a nature or properties which tend to badness; being morally corrupt/bad or wrong; wickedness; mischievous; not good; worthless or deleterious; multinational corporatism; International Monetary Fund/policy; General Agreement on Trade and Tariffs; political apathy; incivility; intolerance, racism; wrong; vicious; as, evil conduct, thoughts, heart, words; producing or threatening sorrow, distress, injury, or calamity; unpropitious; calamitous; an evil force, power, or personification; something that is a cause or source of suffering, injury, or destruction: the social evils of poverty and injustice; anything which impairs the happiness of a being or deprives a being of any good; anything which causes suffering of any kind to sentient beings; injury; mischief; harm; -- opposed to good; as, Evil Clowns, evil tidings; evil arrows; evil days; an evil tyrant; causing ruin, injury, or pain; harmful; anger or spite; malicious and the like [See: Seven Delicious Sins]. Syn: Mischievous; pernicious; injurious; hurtful; destructive; wicked; sinful; bad; corrupt; perverse; wrong; vicious; calamitous.

The process is by some mistakenly limited to organic beings; by others it is applied to the inorganic, the psychical and the metaphysical. It is also applied to explain the existence and growth of institutions, manners, language, civilization, and every product of human activity [see politics]. The agencies and laws of the process are variously explained by different philosophers.

The ultimate and logical conclusion of universal processes and entropy: A good tree can not bring forth evil fruit. --Matt. vii. 18; the inevitable victory of dark forces over the light; The evil one, the Devil; Satan the Day of Reckoning.

The tendency for humans to contribute to the evolution of Evil:

Ah, what a sign it is of evil life, When death's approach is seen so terrible.
- Shak.

Evils which our own misdeeds have wrought.
- Milton.

The evil that men do lives after them.
-Shak.

…But I am in
So far in blood that sin will pluck on sin:
Tear-falling pity dwells not in this eye.
- Shakespeare, Richard III, act IV, SCENE II.

The heart of the sons of men is full of evil.
-Eccl. ix. 3.

He [Edward the Confessor] was the first that touched for the evil.
-Addison.

"For from within, out of the heart of men, proceed evil thoughts, adulteries, fornications, murder, thefts, covetousness, wickedness, deceit, lewdness, an evil eye, blasphemy, pride, foolishness. All these evil things come from within and defile a man."
-Mark 7:21

“I believe that all government is evil, in that all government must necessarily make war upon liberty...”
-Mencken's Creed

There is an evil tendency underlying all our technology - the tendency to do what is reasonable even when it isn't any good.
-Robert Pirsig, Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance

Evil will always triumph over good, because good is DUMB.
-Dark Helmet, Space Balls (movie)

It is a sin to believe evil of others, but seldom a mistake.

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"Bother," said Pooh, as Cthulhu arose from the mists...

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