Insurgent Rebel Clown Army (CIRCA) - Perfectly paradoxical; grotesquely beautiful

Clownbatants Engage Royal Marines With ‘Divide And Fool’ Tactics

Evil Clowns Mock Armed Forces Recruiting


Clumsily cribbed and butchered from:
Sorry. The army isn't recruiting today. Its closed.

A very large and extremely un-amused commando from the Royal Marines tried to throw us out of the [recruiting] centre with the help of a growing number of police officers. But it's hard to move a rebel clown, they don't resist in a conventional sense, but tend to slip out of the clutches of authority like wobbly jelly and distract them from their duties with loud gaffaws and stinging mockery.

The more our pleas to join the army fell on deaf ears:
"Please teach us how to liberate people!"
"Where are the application forms? "
"Why can't we have really really big guns like yours?"

The more chaotic the scene in the recruitment office became. Very long sausage ballons started screaming across the space sounding like ammunition about to explode, sherbert filled toy aeroplanes did manic loop the loops over the RAF desks, one clown crawled around the floor polishing soldiers boots with his feather duster while another read out loud the latest communique from CIRCA … which detailed the absurdity of the so called "hand-over" of power in Iraq and announced the occupation of Leeds by CIRCA and the establishment of the Clown Provisional Authority.

Spot the clown

At one point a very long tape measure appeared and the clowns set up a competition to find the tallest policeman and the smallest protester, an exercise that ended with the clowns getting completely tangled in the tape and falling over.

Whenever the very slick mountain bike cops passed by, clowns would idolize their "cool" lycra shorts, sunglasses and shiny new bikes, causing the police on foot to smile and thus teasing out some of the internal tensions of the force - "divide and fool" being one of CIRCA's key strategies to rebel against the forces of coercive power!

CIRCA's combatants don't pretend to be clowns, they are clowns, real clowns.

Clowns navigate the trackless ether like void engineers under the scrutiny of the unblinking eye:

The first lie of insurgency is that it is everywhere and nowhere
They give resistance a funny face
Improvisation is insurgency
They do not want to change 'the' world, but 'their' world
Evil Clowns will always desert and disobey those who abuse and accumulate power
Because nothing undermines authority like holding it up to ridicule
Because fools are both fearsome and innocent
Because a clown can survive everything and get away with anything.

Run away from the circus: Join the forces of the clandestine insurgent rebel clown army!

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". . . the clowns are organising, the clowns are organising - over and out . . ."

— Overheard on Police radio, July 4th action against Menwith Hill spy base UK.

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Bromide The Clown Loves to Play Substitution

Evil Clowns love stories and sketches
They use them to explain-mock the world
To themselves
and Others

In this skit Bromide reveals the powers of Substitution and Parody to a neophyte clown.

- 2 Clowns

- Distractingly engaging women in flirtatious red dress, clinging, but not tight, ruffling in her confident sexual strides, an alluring smile that boarders on innocent, her full red lips . . .

- Extras in grey, peace officer, sailors, etc.

Ext. Day:

Bromide The Clown: The Big Top is a system, Oddity. That system is our enemy. But when you're inside, you look around. What do you see?

[Honk!]

Business men, teachers, lawyers, carpenters. The very minds of the Clowns we are trying to save. But until we do, these people are still a part of that system, and that makes them our enemy.

[Yoink!]

You have to understand, most of these Clowns are not ready to be unplugged. And many of them are so inert, so hopelessly dependent on the system that they will fight to protect Banality…
Were you listening to me Oddity [meow], or were you looking at the woman in the red dress?

[Woof! Woof! Wolf Whistle]

Oddity The Clown: I was... [Splat – Oddity is pied]

Bromide The Clown: Look again. Spritz it! [Whooosh!]

Oddity The Clown: This...this isn't the Big Top?

Bromide The Clown: No. It's another training program designed to teach you one thing. If you are not one of us, you are one of them.

Oddity The Clown: What are they?

Bromide The Clown: Deadpan literalists and apathetic nonvoters. They can move in and out of any circus still hardwired to Banality. That means that anyone we haven't enlightened is potentially an audience member.

Inside the Big Top, they are everyone and they are no one. We have survived by amusing them, by frightening them, wearing floppy shoes and red noses. But they are the gatekeepers. They are guarding all the doors. They are holding all the keys, which means that sooner or later, someone is going to have to pie them.

[Gasp]

Oddity The Clown: Someone?

Bromide The Clown: I won't lie to you, Oddity. Every single Clown who has stood their ground, stood up for their dignity, everyclown who has fought this injustice - has lost. But where those Clowns have failed, you will succeed.

Oddity The Clown: Why?

Bromide The Clown: I've seen the unenlightened ignore dry humor and even pratfalls. Clowns have emptied entire whoopee cushions at them [Phhattt!] and got nothing but stony faces.

Yet their soul sucking dullness and tedious minds are based in a world that is built on rules. Because of that, they will never be as funny or at least as slightly humorous as you can be working a room with a three drink minimum.

Oddity The Clown: What are you trying to tell me, that I can dodge tomatoes? [Boom! Oddity is knocked off stage]

Bromide The Clown: No Oddity. I'm trying to tell you that when you that when you’re Really Funny, you won't have to.

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If you were going to shoot a mime, would you use a silencer?
- Steven Wright

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